A day in the life of a wild Alexalien…

Dear Diary,

The question I get asked more than any other is, for some strange reason, how I spend my day. Which is a bit insulting, I think, but also illuminating. It shows a genuine interest in my life and tells me just how mature and thoughtful some of my peeps truly are. I like that. I really do.

So here’s how a typical day in the life of a wild Alexalien looks:

1. 6 AM: Wake up and smack Anne awake. Though we don’t technically live together, since I’m her caregiver and I live all the way in Corpus Christi, I’m at her place more often than not. We used to alternate, with her coming to my place for a few weeks and me going to hers, but COVID (and then her getting cancer) changed all that, so we kind of just fell into the habit of being at her place. Soon we’ll return to my place because her crib is small. 😳 And, you know, I terribly miss my big brother’s bougie ass…
2. 7 AM-12 PM: Writing. Usually, my main work in progress, but sometimes (especially if I need more time to think on an element or in between revisions), I’ll dabble in a side project. Whatever it is, I always place my headphones on and listen to my carefully selected playlist for said project, losing myself in the story’s ambiance. Bliss…
3. 12 PM-1 PM: Lunch/anime. Sometimes I just grab something quick and eat while I work, though I try and watch at least one episode of my current anime cause, you know, otaku and all.
4. Get a light, 15-minute workout before returning to the grind.
5. The next three hours are spent doing non-writing author work. Things like processing mail, Patreon/Subscribestar.adult projects, dealing with social media notifications, listening to my podcasts, and – if I somehow manage to finish everything early enough – playing some video games with Anne before I hit the gym.

Repeat the next day.

Boring, right?!

But now you know.

#Alexaliens

 

“The purpose of art is washing the dust of daily life off our souls.”

– Pablo Picasso

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

Dreams…

Dear Diary,

Have you ever seriously thought about the meaning of dreams? Ever since I was a little girl they’ve fascinated me, and when I started becoming interested in psychology it was the first topic I began to heavily research. I experimented with lucid dreaming, dabbled in dream manipulation on both myself and my friends/relatives, and for the longest time even kept a dream journal to study, hoping to find some sort of correlation with my waking life and the things I mused while I slept.

They still fascinate me to this day. You may be able to tell this from my writing, as they often creep into my tales in one way or another.

Unsurprisingly, I tend to have weird dreams myself. Most of the time these are harmless, odd affairs, but sometimes… they can get dark. Not too long ago, I dreamt of my death, the first of its kind, which shook me to my core. I wrote about it in my Diary and even reached out and talked to some of my Patreon and Subscribestar members, and to be honest that helped a bit, but it took days for me to completely shake the powerful emotions it elicited. And then, just yesterday, I had yet another dream, one where I was shot multiple times in the head. I have no idea where these dreams are coming from or why, as I haven’t been watching any gun-heavy shows, but… this time, it didn’t unsettle me as badly as the first. It was more a curiosity than an impactful event, so much so that when I awoke, I casually told my baby squirrel and then bounded about my day.

I don’t know what these dreams mean.

I’m not sure I want to know.

The way I see it, however, I have two choices: agonize over what they could possibly entail or go on about my life and tackle the things that make me happy for as long as I’m in this world. I choose the latter.

How do dreams affect you? What do you believe they mean? Send me an email or private message through one of my various social media accounts and let me know. I’m genuinely curious.

#Alexaliens

 

“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”

– Carl Jung

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

Quitting

Dear Diary,

So I quit drinking on April 18, 2021, and it was the most intelligent thing I’ve done in a long time. Still, in the back of my mind, I knew there were other vices that might not be as dangerous but were still vices. Mainly the three great evils of my life: eating fast food, sweets, and BREAD. I LOVE BREAD, YO! Biscuits, sandwiches, etc… but I always have to work out extra hard to not gain weight from it. During the COVID lockdowns, I quit caring for a bit and kind of slumped into a mild state of depression, but I have this weird thing where I can actually feel myself gaining weight, so I doubled down on my fitness… only to slip again because, you know, bread. 😄

So. I have already quit drinking. The next thing on my hit list? Fast food. Nowadays, eating out is expensive, and the food quality simply doesn’t justify the cost. And then there’s the attitude of the workers… I can’t even avoid these mofos because ordering through a food delivery app like Uber Eats, Grubhub, or DoorDash is insane. They have so many fees and inflated costs tacked on that it’s hardly worth it. Seriously. As an experiment, I went through the ordering page of all three for McDonald’s and showed my big brother just how much the prices for the same menu items differ. It was crazy.

Inflation sucks ass!

It’s also an excellent motivator. So, fast food is now out, and next in line (far down the line) is sweets. I am not looking forward to that battle, yo.

Writing of battles.

I finally finished the short story Haunted, which I originally intended as a Halloween release, but… well, you know how I am. I like to tweak/revise/dissect/chew on/digest/etc. every damn thing I create, so even a short story like this was bound to miss its deadline. However, since it’s (finally) finished, I released it to my Patreon/Subscribestar members a while back and a few days ago uploaded it to Amazon for the rest of the world. So go check it out!

I know this entry is a bit all over the place, but hey, this is a diary, right? I make no apologies. 😜

#Alexaliens

 

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.”

– Walt Disney

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

Dungeons & Dragons… and being Haunted…

Dear Diary,

If you follow me on social media, you likely know that I’m a huge fan of anime, manga, and roleplaying video games (Skyrim, The Witcher, Final Fantasy, etc.). What you might not know is when I was younger, I used to play Dungeons & Dragons with my big brother and his friends religiously every week and became somewhat obsessed with it. The time I spent playing that game… I suppose this explains why, when I grew older, I became so obsessed with roleplaying video games like Skyrim and Final Fantasy. And writing, for that matter. Immersing my mind into the role of another person, becoming that person for a fleeting time, and living in their world… it calls to me on a deep level.

Later on, my brother and his friends decided to do something with the game they loved so much and create a trio of worlds (Zymph, Dark Earth, and MuN), a strategic card game (Warlock: The Enumeration), and even a computer program (DM Secretary) to better help manage their Dungeons & Dragons campaigns. Though Real Life kind of got in the way and one by one everyone dropped off and the projects became inactive, they always maintained a seat in the back of my mind because I saw the potential.

I still do.

So, now that I’m winding down my writing career in a few years (2027, to be exact), I decided to pick them back up and help them blossom into what I know they can be. I’ll use my Patreon and Subscribestar.adult platforms to showcase them and see where things go from there. I’m thinking about hiring someone to make an app for Warlock down the road once I scrounge up all the notes I can find and attack my brother’s brain.

It’s going to be fun, yo, and I feel bad for my baby squirrel because she’s going to be the sounding board for so much of my craziness these next few years… 😄

Speaking of my demon baby squirrel.

I decided to start working on something extra special for Halloween – a short story, Haunted. My goal was for it to be finished by the end of the month, but that definitely didn’t happen. I have the hardest time keeping a story simple and barebones; once you read this puppy, you’ll see what I mean. Here’s the cover (which, for the first time in a long time, I made myself!):

 

 

Once it’s done and I give my Patreon and Subscribestar.adult peeps a chance to read it, I’m uploading it to Amazon. I’m proud of it so far, though it may take at least another week to finish. No regrets. It’s a blast to write.

You know, serious moment: I love being alive. I really do. 🥰

#Alexaliens

 

“There is no winning or losing, but rather the value is in the experience of imagining yourself as a character in whatever genre you’re involved in, whether it’s a fantasy game, the Wild West, secret agents or whatever else. You get to sort of vicariously experience those things.”

– Gary Gygax

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

My retirement (NOT clickbait)

Dear Diary,

So I’m retiring. Not today, or even this year, but at the end of 2026 (the year I turn 40!) (😭), I’m outta here. And no, this is not a joke. I may occasionally post a story, but for the most part? That’s a wrap. Of course, this means I have a shit ton of writing to do before then, so I’m going to pick up the pace and write as often as possible because my backlog is horrendous. Especially when you consider I have to finish the Nephilim, Voyeur, and Killer Lolis series, as well as a few other yarns I haven’t even started to weave yet that are slated to be released.

And it’s not only my backlog either, but those of several pen names as well (such as my big brother’s Change series, which I’m taking over). Any of you that know me in the least know I’m passionate about writing, and my retirement may confuse you because of this. Well, I’ll make it simple: I love writing, but it is not my everything. The people in my life, both digital and non, mean way more, and the more time I spend writing is time I’m taking away from them. Time I could be enjoying them, because, you know, life isn’t promised.

I’ve lost many people I care deeply for; it’s taught me not to take them for granted.

2026 Is still a way off, however, so for now, I’m going to focus on bleeding out on the page. Which is exactly what I’ve been doing. Currently, I’m in the first of my revisions of a heartwarming little diddy called Taking Care of Daddy, a book scheduled to be released on April 1, 2024. So much fun. And… weird. 😄

I love writing, don’t get me wrong, but… to be honest, it’s going to be nice to step away from it all. I mean, by the time I’m 40, which is more or less the halfway marker for life, I’ll need to take a step back and evaluate what’s important to me and what’s not – and, of course, spend as much time as I can with the people I love before they are taken away. Or I from them. After all, no one knows the hour our time is up, right? All we can do is live like it’s our last. ✌

#Alexaliens

 

“I see retirement as just another of these reinventions, another chance to do new things and be a new version of myself.”

– Walt Mossberg

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

I died.

Dear Diary,

I had the most realistic nightmare last night, and I’m finding it impossible to shake. I stayed up late the night before because I had this writing bug (I’m putting the finishing touches on Erotic Urban Legends: Sisters, a Patreon and Subscribestar.adult project of mine, and I’m really into it!), and Anne has a dozen shows she wanted to watch on about as many streaming networks. So we stayed up, went to bed late, and I woke up at my normal 6 AM time… only for my body to tell me it wasn’t having that shit, and a nap was going to happen.

After a few hours of attempting to work, I finally gave in and took a nap.

And I dreamed…

I was at the bank, talking with a cashier for whatever reason. This guy beside me, who was also talking to a cashier, became agitated because she wouldn’t accept a sloppy-looking check of his. He argued, but she stayed firm, and after listening to this for several minutes, I decided to try and be helpful. I told him he might have better luck at a smaller place, like a credit union, and rattled off a few I knew in the area.

He seemed receptive, listening and nodding, then said, “Or I can just do this.”

He pulled out a gun. I froze. I had no idea what to do. He was a lot bigger than me, and I watched in disbelief as he moved his gun arm towards me and started shooting…

Me.

Point blank.

I dropped to the ground.

My vision went first.

My hearing dulled next.

I felt the bullets as they entered my body, but oddly they didn’t hurt – I just felt their pressure. I felt my grip on reality slip, and this strange sort of encompassing darkness began cradling me, and my heart, for some reason, started beating hard in my chest.

I was dying.

It was then that I somehow became aware that this was a dream, so I pulled myself out of it, snapping awake and looking wildly around me. My heart was going crazy, so I closed my eyes and forced myself to calm down. I then grabbed my phone and started typing all this while it was still fresh in my mind (cause, you know, writer, and there’s a good chance I could make an interesting Erotic Urban Legends story using this as the catalyst).

Honestly, I’m still shook. The news lately has been getting to me far more than I let on. Hopefully, this is a one-off event and not the start of a trend. I don’t think I could mentally deal with a recurring dream like that… 😩

#Alexaliens

 

“Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”

– Carl Jung

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.

Writing in my panties

 

Dear Diary,

First of all, fuck this heat. I’m starting to have a psychological break, yo. I mean, at first it was nice, and it gave me an excuse to dress skimpy (which I love), but then it just kept getting hotter! Lately the temperature in the part of Texas I live has been hitting 105°, and… my baby squirrel and I refuse to leave the house unless we absolutely have to. We have officially become domesticated! 🤣 And I’m so strange that when we have the AC cranked up I get too cold, so I turn on my mini heater at my writing desk, but that makes me too hot, but if I turn it off, I’m freezing, which makes me turn it back on… 😭

I’ve taken to just saying fuck it and lowering the air conditioner to warm levels and just sitting around writing in my panties and nothing else. Dead serious.

Come on Winter!!!

Writing-wise, I’m all over the place. I expanded my Little Dead Girls novel by adding four novellas (Cat, Stormy, Lilith, and Brittany), detailing the pasts of some of the main characters, then became inspired by a recurring dream of mine so took a brief break to write that out… only to be distracted yet again by Halloween so deciding to give that a break and write a short erotic horror story to be released on the day of. I’m sure my Patreon and Subscribestar.adult members (who get regular updates on my writing progress) are going crazy trying to keep up with everything I’m doing. If they only saw my to-be-written pile, they would never be the same again…

I mused a long time ago in one of my social media posts that I finally came to the realization that I will never be able to write all the stories I have planned, and that revelation stunned/depressed me. Well, I’ve since changed my philosophy. Though it might not be probable, it is possible, so from now on I’m going to fight like all hell to try. 🥰

#Alexaliens

 

“Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society.”

— Mark Twain

(I strongly disagree! 😄)

 

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.