Thursday, May 30, 2019

How I spent this past week…

Dear Diary,
Not doing a damn thing! Seriously, I just needed a break, a vacation from all the craziness of being an independent author / social media superstar (😆). More importantly, the people I love needed some Alexa time, and if I’m being completely honest, so did I. Want to know what I didn’t do? Write. Or get on social media. Or answer emails. Or anything else.
Well, that’s a bit of a lie.
I did hook up (not like that, pervert. I wish…) with Tera Patrick, who responded to my interview request and even blessed me by following me on Instagram. The interview will be on my Patreon and available to all tiers, as will a few other tidbits related to her. I can’t wait. So much fun. Tera’s an awesome chick, and she’s been my #1 favorite adult actress since I was a little(r) pervert. To be able to interview her was mind-blowing.
Now about my ass. 😅
Or, the area right beside my ass. See, I apparently played so much Skyrim during my off time that I somehow managed to pinch a nerve, and I’ve been walking around like a peg leg pirate ever since. (Much to Anne’s amusement, who keeps calling me Gimp and Limpy and reminds me of how easily she could whoop me now that I’m crippled whenever I innocently talk smack to her) Workouts are out the door until I heal, as are… other things of an exertive, physical nature…
Needless to say, with all this excess energy, I’ve been writing up a storm. 😅
ANYWAY!
I got me some good news, yo! The Secret Life of Miel is now an audiobook! And so is Girl Fight! Both are available on Audible now, and by the time you read this entry, they should also be on iTunes and Amazon. So yeah. Ballin’. You can also find samples of them on my SoundCloud page, in case you’re curious to hear what they sound like. I have some incredible narrators…
More importantly, I have the most incredible readers. I love you guys so much, and don’t think for one minute I don’t appreciate you. Because I do. Which is why I want to offer all of you a free audiobook code, good for any audiobook on Audible, regardless of author or price. Just message me on any of my social media accounts (or email, if you wish) before Monday, and I’ll shoot you one. No strings attached. Just because you’re awesome, you deserve it, and I love you so much for making me a part of your life.
Limit one code per person, of course. If for some reason you don’t know how to contact me, here is a list of my various social media accounts:


I look forward to hearing from you. All you. As always, thank you for reading. You rock. ✊
#Alexa

💡 The More You Know 💡
Two-thirds of college students have been in a friends with benefits relationship, citing the lack of commitment required as the main advantage to such an arrangement. More than half of those who had sex with a friend said they had engaged in all forms of sex; 22.7 percent said they had intercourse only, while 8 percent said they did everything but have intercourse.
Source: Wayne State University and Michigan State University

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.
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Monday, May 20, 2019

R.I.P. God 😭

Dear Diary,
Give me your hand and let me take you back in time about a week. I want to show you how God died, and what killed it. It’s going to be a strange, painful journey, so brace yourself. It forever changed me, and it may well do the same to you. So, brace. And read on…
I had just finished working for the day. I’d written an obscene amount of verbiage, backed everything up like the good writer I am (😂 sorry, couldn’t keep a straight face), and settled back to play some Skyrim as I usually do after a long, hard day of digital ink-slinging.
I rebooted my computer to flush my memory.
I booted up Skyrim.
My laptop froze.
Like, dead froze. Like, nothing at all worked. I had to hard power that motherfucker off, wait for a bit, then power it back on. Only it didn’t get to Windows 10; instead, it went to a boot failure screen that I’ve never seen before. I immediately pulled out my smartphone and started Googling like a madwoman, trying to figure out what the hell happened, and followed the most reputable instructions I could find (a Microsoft employee from their website) to alleviate the issue.
Long story short: my hard drive flat out died. D-E-D. Dead.
This is how God died. (I named my laptop God when I first got it. My new tower – my first tower ever – is named Babel) Rest in peace, my beloved. Your life was over too soon. I was not ready.
In case you can’t tell, it’s been an interesting couple of weeks over here in the #Alexaverse.
On the writing side of things, things are a bit lighter, and I have a ton of news. Erotic Urban Legends: Broken Wings is available for August 1, 2019 preorder. The paperback is available for purchase now, and the audiobook version is currently being recorded by one of my favorite narrators: Robyn Isaacs (She’s the one who narrated Erotic Urban Legends: The Patchwork Girl). Also, the audiobook version of The Secret Life of Miel has been finalized, and we’re just waiting for Audible to approve it. And finally, the audiobook version of Girl Fight is complete! The narrator, the incomparable Sierra Kline, did an amazing job on it – all we’re waiting for now is Audible to approve the final product so it can go out for sale!
So much to be excited for. 🤗
Something not to be excited for? The current part of Exitium Mundi I’m writing. It’s titled Sera, and it’s getting harder and harder to finish. I mean, I’ve cranked out about 10,000 words these past four days, and while that looks good in print… see, part of the problem is that Sera is suicidal, and tends to cut herself. I based her off someone I knew in real life, someone I loved very dearly that isn’t with us anymore. The way Sera’s story ends is kind of dark, with a sliver of light interwoven within.
I’m not gonna lie: it’s hard as fuck to write, and I haven’t quite figured out how I want to wrap it up. Maybe I made it too personal. I keep going back and forth with so many psychological dynamics that I feel like I just need to get drunk and have at it. I dunno.
I remember now why drinking appealed to me so much. 😅 It seems to be the only time my mind calms, the only time I can truly relax and write things I normally wouldn’t be able to. I’m weird, I know, but you guys love me – you wouldn’t be reading this if you didn’t.
And I really, truly, and deeply appreciate that. Thank you. 💖
#Alexa

“Hunger and sex still dominate the primitive mammalian side of human existence, but at the present time it looks as if humanity were within sight of their satisfaction. Permanent plenty, no longer a Utopian dream, awaits the arrival of permanent peace.”
– John Desmond Bernal

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.
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Wednesday, May 8, 2019

Lists, making my boyfriend come baby powder, and being an unknown on social media…

Dear Diary,
Recently Anne and I (because I can’t do shit by myself apparently 😁😭) decided enough was enough and set about to make some serious life changes. We brainstormed all the things that were hindering us and resolved to eventually stop each one. We knew better than to try and do this all at once, of course, but still – we wanted a roadmap, a battleplan. I recorded each of the things we came up with, and since this is my Diary, I’m listing them here. Here’s the list (so far):

🍟 Fast food
🍩 Junk food
🍺 Alcohol
😘 Sex

It’s a pretty serious list. For me, at least. For those of you who are wondering why I included sex, well… I’m kind of obsessed with it. Like, I think about it constantly, and my lover is basically to the point where he’s shooting out baby powder when he comes. Sex is great and all, but I seem to want it all the time, and, well, that isn’t healthy. Especially when I have other responsibilities that could better use that time.
So, I decided it was time to not stop it or anything (I would spontaneously combust after day two) but to put a lid on it, let the urges build (for both of us), and then explode in a firestorm of passion and sensuality.
My lovers down with it. Not that he has a choice or anything. 😂
Now about the no more alcohol part… this is the next hardest thing to stay diligent about. I can drink in moderation and everything, but honestly, I found myself wanting to drink all the time – so I figured it was time to go. Unfortunately, it seems like every movie we watch or every book I read has all kinds of alcoholism in it, so I feel like I’m going to swan dive off the wagon at any given moment. So, I decided to seclude my drinking to the occasional weekend, and my mind immediately started to rebel: But the weekend is only two days a week! And there are seven days in a week! That’s too short a time! At one point my brain was all like: Alcohol isn’t even all that bad! It’s basically a vegetable juice like V8! It comes from vegetables, right?! 🙄 Thoughts like these made me think: was I truly an alcoholic? I mean, I usually only drank during the weekends, and even then, it was limited to a few beers, but sometimes I’d throw in some midweek drinks and even the occasional Monday inebriation. Yeah, OK, maybe I was an alcoholic. So now I’m limiting myself to the weekends, regardless of what my brain says…
Now the fast food (which was getting ridiculously expensive) and the junk food (which was destroying my workouts) was easy in comparison and took almost no mental power to justify. My brain didn’t even try to fight on those two. It was all like: OK, yeah, we’ll give you those. They need to go.
My boyfriend unit is being mysteriously quite about the whole alcohol thing. When I ask him his opinion, he’s all like if that’s what you want to do. When I try and push him for a more straightforward answer, he changes the subject. Why do you motherfuckers do that, anyway? Wouldn’t be so much easier (and require far less energy) to simply talk to us??
Speaking of the boyfriend unit – he introduced me to something heavenly a few days ago: Hamburger Helper Spaghetti! This… this stuff here… is so amazing. I took my first bite, and I swear I came a little. So good. All he added was a little sharp cheddar cheese. The funny thing is, I don’t even like spaghetti that much – unlike Anne, who practically masturbates to it – so when he told me what he was going to make I immediately gave him the look. Because he knows I don’t like spaghetti, and he had the audacity to choose it on his day to cook.
I’m so glad he did.
Anyway.
Lately I’ve been really active on social media, which is kind of a rare thing for me – it dawned on me as I started getting random messages from longtime readers saying things like “I didn’t know you were on insert random social media network here!” or “How long have you been on…?!” that maybe I haven’t advertised my other social media networks that well. So. Here they be:





Pick your favorite and link me!
Oh, and before I go, if you are into Twitch, like RPG games, and have feels for the LGBTQ community, please check out my friends at ColorGuards – and tell them Alexa Nichols sent you. I might get stock options or something. 😜 Thanks. I appreciate it.
#Alexa

“Because there are now online databases of federally funded research, and these databases are searchable by keyword, sex researchers have to be careful how they title their projects. It’s become a simple matter, for those who are so inclined, to find and target researchers whose work they object to on religious grounds.”
– Mary Roach

Disclosure: This post may contain affiliate links that earn me a small commission, at no additional cost to you. This is because I’m a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com.
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